After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet,
which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.

Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humour.

Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas pilots and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.

(P= The problem logged by the pilot.)
(S= The solution and action taken by the mechanics.)

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That’s what they’re for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you’re right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.

Everyday I look multiple times at xcweather to see what is happening round the county, see how the wind is shifting and where I might like to be at the weekend flying.

Today, is windy:

Good session on the landboard managing to land me first 360 before the end of 2006.

Went to BRS the day before New Years Eve for an excellent session on the beach.

News Years Eve Party at Ro’s then the Peg’s, you can see the photos here. It was a good LHF jaunt.

Went out flying and played on ferite2 for a week, played a little WoW as well.

My aunts 60th birthday party last Saturday and Robs on the Sunday evening. Got a little flying in but nothing special. The football pitch was too muddy for me to hold and edge and be able to board properly. Ended up helping someone with some kite skills on their Big Buzz.

Back to work during the week, also went to Maz’s for one of the tastiest lasagnes known to person. Managed to solve some search issues in one of our products which was satisfying as the previous version was a little rubbish.

Went to ExtremeKiteShop both Saturday and Sunday. Saturday was mental winds and bad weather, however I did get out on the pond there. Photos are here. Sunday was a lovely day, winds cleanish, nice for playing on the blades. Ground was a bit soft with the wet so hard to hold an edge. Took Bailey with me and he seemed to love flying the kites and amazed at how much oompf they have. Went and saw Smokin’ Aces in the evening which was actually not as good as it could be, felt like it was made up as they went along.

Some photos:

Two women are walking home after a girlie night out. They are very drunk and the walk home is taking some time due to their intoxicated state.

Eventually, they find themselves desperate for a wee. At that particular moment, they are passing a church and decide to go behind the headstones in the graveyard.

As they finish they both realize they have nothing to ‘freshen-up’ with so the first woman decides to use her knickers and then throw them away.

The second woman is wearing very expensive underwear and is reluctant to lose them, when she notices a new grave nearby with lots of freshflowers, amongst which is a very lavish bouquet with a thick soft ribbon.

Just the job’ she decides and without another thought, duly drags the bouquet over and uses the ribbon to dry herself. Their taskcompleted, the women continue staggering home.

The next morning, the husband of the first woman phones the husband of the second.”We need to keep an eye on our wives. Mine came home with no knickers on last night.”

“You think you’ve got problems” exclaims the second husband “My wife came home last night with a card stuck up her bottom that said, “We’ll Never Forget You – From All the Lads at the Fire Station”